Louds vs Loud
by derangedperson
Summary: April Fools Day has come around again, but this time the Loud family are fighting back. Who will win this great prank war?
1. The Bet Is On

Lynn Sr. and Rita Loud opened the door to the basement, with Rita flipping the lightswitch. "Okay, you guys," Lynn Sr. announced. "Luan's gone! Everyone downstairs!" On his command, the Loud siblings minus one collectively ambled down into the space below. Lincoln brought up the rear, but before he descended the stairs, he turned to face the camera.

"You might be wondering why we're taking such drastic measures," Lincoln said. "Well, tomorrow's April Fools Day, and that's reason enough! Luan's pranks go to a whole other level on April 1st, and we're always caught in the middle! Booby traps, switcheroos, live animals, pies in the face...it's just too much! But this year, I have a plan. So follow me!"

The camera followed Lincoln downstairs as the white-haired boy grabbed an old chalkboard from a dingy corner of the basement, blowing the dust off it as he wheeled it in front of his family members. Curious as to what was going on, Lori asked, "So what's this all about with this meeting in secrecy? I'm literally waiting for Bobby to call me!"

"It's a necessary evil, Lori," Lincoln replied. "I had to wait until Luan was out of the house before I could spring this on you."

Lisa's lisp rang out through the room. "Spring _what_ , exactly? I have some important research waiting for me upstairs, so this had better be worthwhile."

"Trust me, it is..." Before Lincoln could finish his train of thought, his sisters' lines of questioning filled the air with a cacophony of protest:

"I have football practice in an hour, Linc! Can this wait?"

"I've gotta get to soundcheck, bro!"

"Did you really need to turn the lights on? The darkness was perfectly fine."

"POO POO!"

"I've got to...um...do some stuff!"

"There's pageants I've gotta register for!"

"I wanna go outside, Linky!"

Lincoln let out an irritated sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose, knowing that he had lost the crowd. With grim determination, he put the fingernails of his left hand to the chalkboard and slowly dragged them downward, sending an ear-splitting squeal through the room and silencing his sisters' overlapping complaints. "No, it can't wait, I'll be done before then, yes, GA GA, is it important, you can register later tonight, and you can, right after we're done here! OKAY?!"

His sisters nodded collectively as Lincoln grabbed a piece of chalk and began drawing a crude facsimile of a calendar. "I wanna start off by asking...does anyone here know what day it is?"

After a few seconds of thought, Leni's arm shot up in the air. "Ooh! Ooh! I know! Today's, like, _today_!"

The boy grinned. "True, Leni, but I need today's _date._ Anyone?" Lana raised her hand. "Um...today's the 31st, right?"

"That's right. March 31st, to be exact. And we all know what tomorrow is..." With a dramatic flourish, Lincoln pointed to his calendar drawing, which featured a giant 1 surrounded by a huge circle with ten arrows pointing at it. "Tomorrow is _APRIL FOOLS DAY!_ "

Dramatic thunder echoed through the room as a panic bomb went off amongst his parents and sisters. Lola and Lana hugged each other, Lynn Sr. and Rita fell to the ground in the fetal position, Lori and Leni screamed in terror, Luna sank to her knees and let out a big "NO!", Lynn put on a football helmet and grabbed a hockey stick while gently placing another helmet on top of Lily, Lucy stepped back into a dark corner for camouflage, and Lisa pressed a button on the side of her glasses, activating a protective bubble around herself. Lincoln watched all of this unfold and remarked, "I take it you guys forgot?"

"We didn't forget, son," Lynn Sr. replied. "We just tried to ignore it and hope it'd go away!"

"Well, that's not gonna work, dad! April Fools is tomorrow, and this time, I have a plan."

"Funny," Luna said. "That sounds almost exactly like what you said last year."

"Let me guess," Lori cracked. "You're gonna try and lock her in a crate again, right? We tried that last year and look where it got us!"

"Yes." Lucy's exclamation and sudden appearance next to her sister sent the eldest Loud sibling jumping back in fright. "It got us pain and humiliation...but mostly humiliation."

"Really? Because I wound up in the heart of downtown last year. And I never _could_ find the kitchen, now that I think about it," Leni added.

"It took so...darn...long to clean out Vanzilla," Rita said as her eyes glazed over.

"And upon reviewing my plan of action from last year, I've come to a conclusion: I made a mistake trying to lock myself in my room. The only way to beat Luan is to combat Luan. This year, we're gonna fight pranks with pranks. This year, we strike back!"

Lisa popped her head through the top of her bubble and asked, "What are you saying, brother?"

"I'm saying that there's twelve of us, and one of Luan. The numbers game is ours, and there's no reason that we can't come up with some good pranks of our own! Remember, according to her rules, anyone that steps foot on the Loud property on April 1st is fair game. _That includes her._ "

The dawning realization struck his sisters and parents like a thunderbolt. Devious grins soon filled the room as Lana exclaimed, "Luan comes in the front door, and BOOM! Mud pie right in the kisser!"

"I could shake up a can of soda or something!"

"Syrup and feathers!"

"Hockey pucks!"

"Stage dives!"

"My phone!"

"Tiaras and mirrors!"

"GA GA!"

"Of course! There's plenty of things in this house that we can use! God, why didn't we think of this sooner?"

"So what do you say, Loud family? Are you ready to get your prank on?"

A collective "YEAH!" echoed as everyone put their fists in the air, only for the celebratory mood to be darkened as the sound of applause rang through the room. Standing at the foot of the basement steps was Luan Loud, a smug, brace-filled grin plastered on her face, her hands filling the room with mirthless applause. Her siblings and her parents blanched and began sweating as she started to speak.

"Well, well, well. Do I hear what I think I hear? My family thinks they can beat me at April Fools pranks?" She paced in front of the group, staring everyone down as her harangue continued. "You don't really believe you can win, do you?"

Even though she was terrified, Lola jabbed her finger at Luan and exclaimed, "Sure we do! There's only one of you, and twelve of us! The odds are in our favor!"

"Yeah! And, like, so are the evens!"

Luan laughed, but it wasn't a normal laugh. "Oh, sister, even with the twelve of you against me, there's no way you can pull this off. I am the queen of April Fools, and it's high time I reminded you of what I'm capable of. Tomorrow, prepare yourselves for a Prank-pocalypse of epic proportions!"

Lincoln stepped forward, rolling up his sleeves as he did so. Steel-eyed determination was on his face as he answered Luan's threat with one of his own:

 _"I can't wait."_

Luna walked to Lincoln's side, placing her hand on his shoulder in solidarity. Slowly but surely, the remaining members of the Loud family surrounded their only son, returning Luan's glare with twelve more, each one as determined as the next.

"How about a friendly competition, Luan?" Leni asked. "You think you're the queen of April Fools? Well, there's twelve of us here who can't wait to knock you off your throne. So, here's my idea. Every successful prank that gets pulled, gets you a point. Whoever's got the most points at the end of the day wins."

The relative complexity of her idea sent everyone into a state of shock, including Luan. However, she quickly regained her smug composure and replied, "And what are the stakes?"

Lynn replied, "If you win, you get to prank us all at your April Fools level for the rest of the week."

"And if _we_ win," Lori added, "the title of 'Queen and King of April Fools' gets passed to us, and you can _never_ pull another prank again."

Luan tapped her finger against her chin in an exaggerated thinking motion. "Hmmm...those are some high stakes. I don't know if I can accept..."

In the meantime, Lincoln had spotted out of the corner of his eye one of Luan's rubber chicken gags. He grabbed it and thrust it in her face, exclaiming, "What's the matter, Luan? You _chicken?_ " He let out an exaggerated laugh before spitting out the final two words: _"Get it?"_

The initial shock of Lincoln's threat startled her, but Luan regained her confidence just as fast, replying, "Oh, I get it. And I accept your stakes." She extended her hand to shake on the deal, with Lincoln eyeing it up and down, looking for a joy buzzer, something that let him know it was fake, anything. Regardless, he shook her hand, sealing his family's April Fools fate.

"May the best prankster win."

"Good luck, everyone." Luan tossed a wad of dough towards them, which was caught by Lynn Sr. "You're gonna _knead_ it." She began to laugh as she ascended the stairs, shutting the door behind her with an echoing slam. At that moment, Luna delivered a quote.

"As a wise man once said, 'pray for the best, prepare for the worst, and expect the unexpected.'"

"Cool quote, Luna," Lana replied as the family ascended the stairs. "Didja get it from one of your rock bands?"

"Nah...I found it on the internet."


	2. Shots Fired

Midnight.

April Fools Day was officially underway. At that moment, Luan Loud lay sleeping in her bed while her family gathered in Lisa and Lily's room, eager to see what the little genius had cooked up for them.

"Now then," Lisa declared, "at sunrise, we strike. However, the speed and efficiency at which my older sister works when it comes to tomfoolery is all but unmatched. Therefore, in order to keep track of where she is, I give you this." She handed out small GPS units to each of her siblings and her parents; when she booted them up, a wire-frame model of the interior of their house appeared on the screens, with a blinking yellow dot three rooms down, showing that Luan was still fast asleep.

"Cool!" Leni exclaimed. "What's this a map of again?"

"Our house. I have also included a map of the backyard, the front yard, and Vanzilla just to be on the safe side."

"Wow, Lisa, this is great," Lincoln exclaimed. "Now that we can keep tabs on Luan, there's no way she can get the drop on us!"

"Uh...the yellow dot's moving, guys." Lori's announcement was followed by a simultaneous glance down at their GPS units, showing that Luan was right outside their door. "Everyone stand back," Lynn said as she grabbed the doorknob. "I'll get this one."

She swung the door open and was met with a banana cream pie to the face. She swung the door closed just as fast and declared, "The first shot has been fired."

"I see. In addition to the maps, I have also included a tally system," Lisa said as she switched to that option. "Our successful pranks are on the left, and Luan's are on the right. Unfortunately, at this point, she's in the lead, but we still have 23 hours and 41 minutes to play some pranks on her. Now that we have what we need, all I can say is good luck, stay vigilant, and never. Let. Up. Good night, and happy pranking."

As everyone retreated to their rooms, Luna, Lynn and Lucy peered into the room that the rocker and joker shared, finding her asleep in her bed. The trio crept into her room and snuck up to her bedside, discovering that her back was turned towards them. "Clever girl," Lucy said.

Lynn asked, "Is it really her or just a dummy?"

"There's only one way to find out." Luna glanced at her GPS and, sure enough, the blinking yellow light was in her room. Closer inspection revealed that the figure's chest rose and fell with each breath, and that was enough to convince them.

"Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking?" Ever the stoic, Lucy replied, "Yes. Yes, I am."

"Same here, sis."

"Okay. I'll take the front, you two take the back." The trio took their positions. "On three, okay? One..."

Three sets of hands clenched down on the mattress.

"Two..."

The trio shot each other nervous, excited glances. It was time to fight fire with fire.

"THREE!"

* * *

It had been unusually cold that night. At least, that's what Luan thought as she stretched and awoke. The whole day awaited to create some epic comedic mischief. She reached for her alarm clock, but to her surprise, she grabbed at air and wound up slapping her palm against a fistful of grass.

 _Wait a minute...GRASS?!_

Luan bolted up to discover that her matress, herself included, had been moved outside. She threw her covers off and walked onto the front porch, but when she reached the second step, a booby trap activated and dumped a bucket of freezing cold water on her. As she stood there shivering, the window opened and Lynn and Luna stuck their heads out. The rocker exclaimed, "Hey, no need to be so _cold_ , Luan!"

"Yeah! It's not our fault you got such a _chilly_ reception!" The duo laughed and shut the window as Luan ran upstairs, both to dry herself off and change into her everyday clothes. "They got me," she said to herself, "but the day's still young! Plenty more opportunities await!" She changed into her clothes and went to brush her teeth, not seeing Lisa peeking around the corner, chuckling evilly.

Luan squeezed some toothpaste onto her toothbrush and began brushing back and forth. Unfortunately, a few seconds into her morning routine, she discovered that the minty freshness of the toothpaste had been replaced by a flavorless, almost medicinal taste. She spit out the concoction and glared down at the toothpaste tube. It had all the markings of minty fresh Crest, but the outer label came off with ease to reveal its true identity: Icy Hot. Luan gagged and chugged mouthwash for a good minute and a half, stopping when Lisa's signature lisp filled her ears.

"I guess the _tooth_ hurts, doesn't it? Just try and _brush_ it off, dear sister!" The genius laughed and ran down the stairs, only to be met at the bottom with a roller skate that launched her through the still-open front door and outside into the morning air. Luan walked downstairs and replied, "I already have, and there's no need to _skate_ around the obvious! Hahahahaha...get it?!" Lisa growled in anger and increased Luan's tally by one. The Loud siblings still had a 3 to 2 advantage, but there was plenty of day left and it was only a matter of time before Luan brought out the big guns. The family was alerted to the score change just as Lincoln and Lucy finished setting up their trap.

"Luan got one," Lincoln said.

"It was to be expected," Lucy replied. "If you like, I can summon a trickster demon to give us a hand."

"That won't be necessary, Lucy. Besides, there's no way she'll see this coming."

"See _what_ coming, Lincoln?" The duo turned around to see Luan's grinning visage standing right in front of them. "So amateur of you two to set up your trap right in front of me. You couldn't possibly think-"

Unbeknownst to her but knownst to Lucy and Lincoln, Luan had triggered their trap. They both grinned as the trap activated-the pressure of Luan's foot on the rope opened a cage directly over her head, and once there was enough room, a swarm of bats exploded out of the cage and swarmed Luan. She screamed in fright and ran into the nearest room, which turned out to be the one she shared with Luna, and threw her window open to allow the pests to escape. To Lincoln's surprise, Lucy cracked, "Looks like we got the _drop_ on you. Doesn't that drive you _batty?_ " Then she grinned. It was a small grin, but a grin nonetheless.

"Just a little," Luan replied, "but this'll drive you _NUTS!_ " She knocked her foot into the doorjamb, causing a pair of squirrels to jump on Lincoln and Lucy's faces, the duo screaming and grabbing at the animals as they vanished down their shirts. "Because squirrels eat nuts! Get it?!" Luan bounded down the stairs with the squirrels in tow as Lincoln grabbed his GPS and entered two more tallies in her favor.

They were now tied at four apiece.

* * *

Luan had finished rigging the refrigerator, wiping the sweat from her brow as she tested the mechanism. Once the door was opened, a small catapult activated, launching some test ammo across the kitchen. "Perfect," she exclaimed. "Works like a charm!" She grabbed a cake and loaded it into the catapult, grinning at the thought of a chocolate-covered sibling or parent. Before she closed the door, she let out a small cough, her throat having gone dry during the setup process.

"Man, all this pranking takes a lot out of ya," she said to herself. "I am _thirsty._ " Luckily for her, a can of Sprite was there for the taking right next to her trap. Luan grabbed it and cracked it open, only to be greeted by a pressurized spray of lemon-lime soda that wound up emptying half of the can. All she could do was blink in shock as Lana ran through the kitchen, exclaiming, "Don't give up, sis! All you need is a _can_ -do attitude!" Luan wiped off her face with a nearby towel and glared at her younger sister, but instead of grim determination, her face softened and a small, warm smile appeared. It was almost as if she was...proud of her. By her count, her family had the edge on her once again, but she knew a surefire way to get the lead back. With a sly grin, Luan called out, "Oh, _Leni..."_


	3. Mail's Here

For the last few years, every new mailman hired at the Royal Woods post office was warned about the goings-on at 1216 Franklin Avenue on April Fools Day. Granted, delivering the mail to that address on any given day was fraught with danger, but April 1st was circled in red and underlined twenty times on their calendars. Literally. A little after 1 p.m., a squad of deliverymen approached the house-five of them clad in SWAT gear and surrounding the unlucky sod who had the responsibility of delivering the Louds' mail. The mailman himself was a nervous wreck, drenched in sweat and eyes darting back and forth, mumbling, "Get in and get out. Get in and get out. Get in and get out."

"It's okay, buddy," one of the SWAT guys said. "We're almost there." The sextet approached the Loud house with extreme caution, the mailman repeating his mantra and looking on the verge of a panic attack the whole time. "All you've gotta do is put the mail down and I'll slide it under the door with this," the second guy said as he pulled out an extendable metal rod.

"Y...you're sure?"

"Trust us...you're gonna be _fine."_

His words seemed to have a calming effect on the mailman, and it was a good thing indeed because the Loud house was right in front of them. The sextet stopped at the sidewalk to the front door, giving everyone a chance to catch their breath and gird their loins for the craziness that was sure to come. There were only three pieces of mail to be delivered to the Loud house on this particular day, which made their job that much easier. The group walked up the steps to the front porch, testing each plank to make sure it wasn't booby-trapped. Since everything seemed okay, the mailman dropped the three letters on the ground in front of the door, then stepped back as the second SWAT guy extended the rod and began to push the mail under the door.

"Almost there..." The first letter made it through with no trouble.

"Halfway home..." The second letter got caught, which made everyone more than a little uneasy, but eventually made its way into the house. SWAT guy 2 exhaled loudly and said, "All right! One more to go."

He began to push the letter under the door, and like the first two, he was successful. He turned to his comrades and gave an enthusiastic thumbs-up, exclaiming, "See? No trouble at-"

The front door exploded open as Lynn Sr. and Rita tore out of the house, shoving the SWAT team and the mailman aside as they ran towards Vanzilla. A precursory glance into the house revealed countless traps, gags and assorted instruments of mayhem being triggered one after the other by Leni, despite the best efforts of her siblings to get her to stop. The plainly worded signs and arrows, however, proved too tempting for her to resist. This particular arrow pointed to the couch and said "HAVE A SEAT," to which Leni replied, "Thanks, sign!" Lincoln dove to her with a loud "NOOOOO!" but it was no use, for when Leni sat down, a spring launched her straight out the open door and into the SWAT guys, bowling them over. The mailman cringed at the sight and cringed once again when Mr. and Mrs. Loud opened Vanzilla's trunk only to be face to face with a giant fan and a large bag of flour. They saw it coming and hit the deck as the door opened all the way, and when it did, the fan activated and the bag fell, spewing a huge white cloud all over the end of the driveway.

Lynn Sr. slowly rose from his prone position and exclaimed, "We dodged it, honey! WE DODGED IT!"

Rita replied, "It's an April Fools miracle!" Leni picked herself up and approached the flour, remarking, "Ooh! Snow!" She fell onto her back and began making a flour angel as the mailman and SWAT guys gathered their bearings and continued on their way. As they left the craziness they'd seen behind and headed further down Franklin Avenue, the mailman asked his companions, "You're saying this happens _all the time_ on April Fools?"

"ALL the time," SWAT guy two replied.

"No wonder you guys do this."


	4. Leni A Hand

Leni's ears perked up when she heard her name being called, and she came downstairs into the kitchen where Luan was waiting for her. The jokester grinned as she asked, "I think I left my phone in the fridge, dear sister. Can you take a look for me?"

"Sure!" With a smile, Leni opened the fridge, and the trap activated, launching the chocolate cake right into her face. She put her finger into some of the frosting and into her mouth when Lori came into the kitchen. The sight of her cake-covered younger sister made her blanch and exclaim, "Leni, what did you _do?!"_

"Luan said her phone was in the fridge, so I looked! No phone, but there was some cake!" She grabbed a chunk off the top of her head and offered it to Lori with a cheerful "Want some?"

Lori smacked the cake out of her hand, replying, "No, I don't want any cake, Leni! You've gotta be more careful! No offense, but you're pretty easy to fool!"

Leni let out an offended gasp. "I am _not!_ I am perfectly aware of everything that's going on right now! Sure, Luan got me, but I promise you, I am _not_ going to fall for any of her tricks again!" No sooner did those words leave her lips than Leni caught sight of a large sign in the shape of an arrow pointing to the kitchen window. "'Open me?' Whatever you say, Mr. Sign!"

"LENI, NO!"

She threw the window open and a small cooler tipped over, dumping vanilla ice cream onto her head. When the window was fully open, two cans of whipped cream on either side of the sill activated, their contents emptying onto Leni's head. And for a final touch, a cherry dropped onto the mess of cake and ice cream as Luan, who hadn't moved during any of this, declared, "Now you're wearing your _sundae_ best, Leni! Hahahahaha!" She bounded out of the kitchen as Lori growled in frustration, handing her younger sister a towel. "Clean yourself off, Leni, and for crying out loud, _try_ to be more aware! Luan's got the lead now, and we can't afford any more mistakes! Do you understa-"

Lori never finished her sentence. Within the span of a few seconds, Leni had opened the silverware drawer and activated yet another trap, causing her to be covered in 64 slices of American cheese. "What did you say? I didn't catch that." Lori's jaw dropped as Luan's smug voice rang out: "It's almost too _cheesy_! Hahahahaha! At this rate my victory is assured! Just give up now!"

"Never!" Lori replied. "MOM! DAD!"

Lynn Sr. and Rita poked their heads around the corner. "What is it, Lori?"

"Do you have anything that can keep Leni from activating any more traps?"

"Uh...we have some rope in the back of the van..."

"Go get it!" A loud crash echoed through the house. _"NOW!"_

"Okay!" Her parents ran out the door, tossing the mailman and SWAT guys to the side as Leni's siblings pushed against her with all their might, trying to get her to stop activating Luan's traps.

"Leni, stop! Don't give Luan any more easy victories!"

"It's not worth it!"

"Yeah, sis! Eventually the jokes aren't free and nothing's ever fun and NOTHING'S FUNNY!"

"But...but the signs!"

"IGNORE THEM! JUST IGNORE THEM!"

"Can't you see I'm trying?!"

 _"TRY HARDER!"_ Unfortunately, trying harder would have to wait as this particular sign proved too tempting to resist. "Have a seat? Thanks, sign!" Lincoln dove to stop her with a big "NO!" but it was too late. Her weight activated the trap and a giant spring launched Leni out the front door, bowling over the SWAT guys and landing amongst them in a heap. Her parents had managed to avoid the trap in Vanzilla's trunk, but Leni being Leni, that wasn't what she noticed.

"Ooh! Snow!" She flopped down on the ground and began making snow angels as her parents stared dumbfounded at the scene before them. Some of the powder made its way into Leni's mouth, and once she got a taste of it, everything clicked. She gasped in shock and anger at her realization while her siblings joined her parents in a collective death glare.

"Wait a minute...this is flour! You know what? I think I've been tricked!"

Everyone slapped their foreheads and growled in frustration as Leni picked herself up and dusted herself off. "I don't believe this! All those signs were traps! Why didn't you guys _tell_ me?"

Frustration gave way to anger as her family shouted, _"WE_ _ **DID!"**_ Lori's eye twitched as she added, "You know, _Leni,_ you can _still help us win."_

"Really? How?"

* * *

The Loud siblings marched upstairs as Luan sat in the recliner sipping some water and grinning smugly. They held Leni above their heads, her torso and legs bound with rope to keep her from escaping. "Hey guys, how does tying me up help you win?"

Lisa replied, "You have just answered your own question, sister!" The group marched to Lisa and Lily's room and plopped her down in Lily's crib, raising the guardrail to keep her secure. "That ought to hold you!" Lynn said. "Now stay there until the day's over!"

"But...but I can still help, guys! Really!"

Luna retorted, "You'll help us enough from right here! Now STAY!"

Leni pouted and flashed her best puppy-dog eyes to gain their sympathies, but it didn't work. Her siblings slammed the door, leaving her all by herself. She grunted in frustration and leaned back against the crib's headrest, causing yet another trap to activate and pour baby powder all over her.

At that point, there was nothing for her to do but cry like a baby.


	5. Surrender?

The GPS chirped, registering another tally in Luan's favor. When it did, a collective angry yell exploded from the Loud siblings, all of them stunned that Leni had mananged to find a way to get Luan more points in her state. Lincoln slumped against the door and let out a heavy sigh as he slid down to a seated position. His sisters were just as weary as he was, with Lynn and Lisa shaking their heads and downcast moods all around. Lynn mumbled, "Man, I _really_ hated having to do that."

Lincoln responded, "We didn't have a choice! Luan's leading nearly three to one at this point, and there's only seven hours left!"

"Six hours and fifty-seven minutes, to be exact," Lisa said.

"Right! Six hours and fifty-seven minutes left in the day for us to catch up! We're gonna have to turn on the afterburners to stand a chance of winning, and I just don't know how we're gonna do it!"

"That's because we _can't_ do it, bro," Luna responded with a defeated sigh. "Luan's just too good."

"Yeah," Lola added. "For every prank we pull, she comes back with at least three more! We can't keep up!"

Lincoln bolted up and replied, "Guys, remember what I said yesterday? There's twelve-well, eleven now-of us and one of Luan! If we put our heads together, we're bound to come up with something!"

"Well, Leni pretty much blew it for us," Lynn replied. "According to the tally on the GPS, Luan's leading 13 to 4! That's some New England Patriots-level buttkicking!"

"Face it, Lincoln," Lucy said. "It's hopeless. In fact, I've just written a poem to announce our surrender. I'm gonna go deliver it to Luan right now."

"B...but Lucy!"

With sadness in her eyes, Luna retorted with, "It's _over_ , bro! Sometimes you've gotta know when to fold 'em."

"Yeah, Lincoln," Lori added. "We can't keep doing this."

The sadness and defeat in his sisters' eyes caused Lincoln to bow his head with a frown and sigh in agreement. "All right. Lucy, is your poem ready?"

"Yeah."

"Let's get this over with."

* * *

Luan cuddled Lily in her arms as she sat in the recliner, drinking water and watching old stand-up routines on the Yuk-Yuk Channel. It was her way of taking a break from her pranking, because even the best comediennes needed to unwind once in a while. "Ah, Lily, this is the life. Comedy in the house, comedy on TV, my baby sister in my arms...life is good."

"It's about to get even better." Lucy's sudden appearance made Luan scream in surprise, her elder sister exclaiming, "That doesn't count as a prank!"

"Sigh. And here I thought it would. Regardless, I have come down here on behalf of my siblings to announce the terms of our surrender...in poem form."

"HA! I knew it! Once again, the queen of April Fools reigns supreme! Get ready for a whole week of prank-tastic fun!" She put Lily in her wheelie popper and slouched in the recliner, the smugness practically dripping off of her, and said, "Proceed."

Lucy cleared her throat and began as her siblings watched from the stairs, their heads hung in shame. "This poem is called 'April Fools.'

13 to 4.  
An impossible score.  
There's no way we can possibly beat you.  
Pranks appear left and right.  
We put up a good fight.  
It was foolish to try and defeat you.  
But if we want to win,  
Then we must begin  
To make our ideas much bolder."

Lincoln raised his head in surprise as Lucy finished her poem.

"So I say to you,  
Whatever you do,  
Don't you dare look over your shoulder."

Luan laughed and replied, "That's so amateur, telegraphing your own moves like that! But, because I'm feeling so darn confident, I'm going to do just that!" She turned around, looking over both of her shoulders before returning to face Lucy. "See? Nothing to-"

A spritz of seltzer water silenced her as Lucy squeezed the trigger of the bottle, sending the fizzy concoction right into Luan's face. She screamed in surprise and tried to block the flow with her hands, to no avail as Lucy just came in closer. Once the bottle was empty, Lucy tossed it aside and said, "If you thought we'd give up that easily, you're all _wet."_ She leaned in and flashed a wicked grin before retreating to her siblings, giving them semi-enthusiastic high fives.

Lincoln stood stunned at this sudden turn of events. "But...but I thought you guys were..."

His sisters cut him off with a giant yell of "APRIL FOOLS!"

"We had you going there, didn't we, Linky?" Lola said with a grin.

"Come on, bro! There's no way we're giving up! In fact..." Luna grinned and turned to face Luan. "We're just getting started."

"Oh? And what's _that_ supposed to mean?" Luan stood with her hands on her hips as Lily bumped into her, knocking her to the floor with a thud. Lily laughed at her achievement, her laughter soon replaced by a belch that spewed thrown-up milk all over Luan's blouse. "Ga ga ga... _POO POO!_ Hahahahaha!"

Lily waddled over to her siblings, who cheered her on as they picked her up out of the walker. Meanwhile, Luan got to her feet, the smell of Lily's throw-up nearly making her retch as she tore up the stairs to her room. Her siblings watched with smug grins of their own as the door to the bathroom slammed shut. With a sly grin, Lana asked, "Mom! Dad! How do you adjust the water heater?"


	6. Retaliation

The stench was overpowering. Lily's diapers were one thing, but Luan never would have guessed that her throw-up would be on par with them, if not worse. She figured the smell would be baked into that particular blouse forever, so she stuffed it in her garbage can, the garbage can in a trash bag, the trash bag in a box, and threw the box out her window. Even though the offending garment was gone, the smell still remained; Luan covered her mouth and nose and tore into the bathroom, disrobing and jumping in the shower in the blink of an eye. She grabbed the loofah sponge and dumped a waterfall of body wash on it, scrubbing her body to rid herself of the horrible smell. But, unbeknownst to her, Lana and her parents were standing in the basement next to their water heater, a giant wrench in the six year old's hands.

Before anything happened, Rita asked, "Now, honey, are you _sure_ you can handle this?"

"Sure I'm sure, mom! I mean, it _seems_ easy enough..."

"Okay then," Lynn Sr. replied. "All you've gotta do is clamp down on this nut right here. If you want the water to be warmer, go clockwise. If you want it colder, go counter-clockwise."

"Good to know, dad! Thanks for the tip!"

"Anytime, honey. Just be careful." With her parents watching over her, Lana clamped the wrench down on the nut her father pointed to and turned it counter-clockwise ever so slightly. Upstairs, Luan felt the water get just a little bit colder, so she turned the shower knob, making it just a little bit warmer. Since she heard no reply, Lana cranked the wrench further, and Luan felt the change immediately. She yelped in surprise and turned the shower knob higher until the water got warm again. Frustrated by the lack of an audible reaction, Lana spit on her hands and wrenched on the nut as hard as she could, and that was when she heard a shocked scream from upstairs.

"That's my cue!" She dropped the wrench and tore upstairs to deliver the punchline, arriving just as Luan covered herself with a towel. _"Water_ you waiting for, sis? We're gaining on you!" Lana laughed and ran to the bedroom she shared with her twin, opening the door only to be met by a water balloon crashing into her stomach. It exploded on contact, leaving her dripping wet. Lana grumbled to herself as Luan said, "Just thought I'd _pop_ by! Hahahahaha!"

With a smile, Luan ducked into her room and began to get dressed. The majority of her clothes went on with no problems, but when she put her shirt on, a massive itching sensation made her tear it off just as fast. The itching didn't go away, however, as Luan tried to find something, _anything,_ to relieve her agony. She grabbed Luna's drumsticks and dragged them up and down her back, but that did no good. She grabbed a plastic hanger and dragged it up and down her back, but still no luck. Desperate for relief, she dropped to the floor and scooted around on her back, moving up and down, in a circle, in a line, and every other direction she could. That seemed to do the trick as she rose from the floor with an exhausted smile, not noticing Lynn standing in her doorway until she spoke.

"An _itch_ in time saves nine, Luan! Come get some!"

Luan threw a different shirt on and replied, "Gladly!" Lynn began to run, easily outpacing her sister as they made their way downstairs. When Luan reached the living room, she searched every nook and cranny for her athletic sibling, but turned up nothing. "Now where'd she get to?"

 _"STAGE DIIIIIIIIIVE!"_

Before Luan could react, Luna dove off the bannister and landed on top of her, flipping her onto her back and grabbing her legs. Luan squirmed and flopped around like a fish out of water to try and get away, but was quickly immobilized when Luna yelled, "Lynn! Grab her arms!" Lynn burst in from outside and did so, stretching her arms over her head, leaving her entire body defenseless. The jokester knew instantly what they were going to do, and prepared for the worst.

"Well, Luan," Luna said as she rose to her knees, her legs pinning her sisters' together. "Looks like our pranks haven't slowed you down...so let's see if this one _tickles_ your fancy!" Luna swooped down and dug her fingers into Luan's sides, causing her sister to scream in surprise and dissolve into helpless laughter. Lynn attacked Luan's neck and armpits, amplifying the sensation to nigh-unbearable levels. The duo couldn't help but laugh themselves as they tortured her, years of April Fools payback being unleashed in this moment.

"You've had this coming for _years,_ Luan! This is for replacing Chloe's strings with spaghetti noodles!"

"This is for switching out my soccer ball with a balloon!"

"This is for pretending to be Mick Swagger and fooling me into a fake tour offer!"

"This is for stealing my sports trophies!"

"This is for filling my drums with whipped cream!"

"This is for convincing me I didn't place in the Royal Woods football tourney!" Luan's laughter filled the air throughout all of this, tears spilling from her eyes as her sisters attacked. She squirmed and flailed, trying desperately to escape to no avail as her sisters' collective grip was too strong. When it stopped all of a sudden, her laughter died down as she took several deep breaths. But it was short lived, as Luna had turned her attention to Luan's feet.

"And now...it's time for a guitar _sole-o!"_ Luna slid off Luan's shoes and socks, grabbing a guitar pick out of her pocket. "O...oh no! D...don't you dare, Luna!"

"Oh, I dare!" Luna grabbed Luan's right foot and held it like a guitar, dragging the pick up and down the center and heel while pretending to hold the frets with her left hand, digging her fingers into Luan's foot when she did. While the initial attack had her laughing, this particular move had her hysterical. The more she squirmed, the harder Luna attacked. After twenty seconds of this, Luna announced, "Oops! Looks like this guitar's out of tune! I better tighten the strings!"

A small "oh no" escaped Luan's lips as Luna began to attack her toes, pretending to adjust the tightness of guitar strings while dragging the pick up and down her foot. The simple, harmless wiggling was too much to take, and with one hard jerk, Luan broke free of Luna's grip and put her knees to her chest, laughing uncontrollably as Lynn let go of her arms. The duo stood up and high fived each other, Lynn exclaiming, "Awesome job, sis!"

"Likewise!" The pair glared at Luan, whose laughter was dying down at this point. With a satisfied smile, Lynn said, "Looks like we're right back in this!"

"Yep! 14 to 10 by my count! Let's get outta here before she recovers!" The duo laughed as they ran outside, leaving Luan to catch her breath. When she did, she put her socks and shoes back on and dusted herself off. With a sly grin, she replied, "Oh, we'll see about that. Time to break out the big guns."


	7. Backyard Meeting

The Louds' backyard was abuzz with activity as Lynn, Luna and Lana revealed what they'd done. Their siblings listened spellbound as they told their tales of how they'd managed to rack up the points.

"And then we tickled her till the cows came home!"

"Wow," Lincoln replied. "That's pretty hardcore, Lynn!"

"We figured it'd be some small payback for how she's gotten us over the years."

Energized by the news, Lincoln declared, "Well, thanks to you guys, we're right back in this game! Just a few more pranks and we can tie this thing up!"

"Tying is not an option, bro," Lynn replied. "We're gonna _win_ this thing! So let me hear you say it!"

"All right! We're gonna WIN!"

"How about you guys? Are we gonna tie?"

A loud "NO!" rang out through the night.

"What are we gonna do?!"

"WE'RE GONNA WIN!"

"I can't hear you!"

 _"WE'RE GONNA WIN!"_

"ONE MORE TIME!"

 _ **"WE'RE GONNA WIN!"**_

"That's right! We've got four hours left, so let's get this thing done!"

"YEAH!"

* * *

Luan opened the door to Lisa and Lily's room and began to load up her arsenal. Stacks and stacks of banana cream pies filled the room as Leni watched it unfold with great interest. "Whatcha doing, Luan?"

"Exactly what I said I'd do," she replied.

"What's that?"

Luan carried a giant slingshot into the room and set it up in front of the window, replying, "Breaking out the big guns."

"Your big guns broke out? Maybe you should put some acne cream on them so they'll clear up."

Luan rolled her eyes and replied, "I'll keep that in mind." Stealth was of utmost importance for a sneak attack of this magnitude, so she slid the window open as quietly as she could, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. The backyard provided little shelter and a wide open space to attack, and the vantage point from her youngest siblings' room gave her a full view of it. With an evil grin, Luan loaded the slingshot with a pie and took aim.

* * *

At Lisa's insistence, the Loud siblings lay on their stomachs in close quarters to each other, whispering their next plan.

"Okay," Lisa said. "By my calculations, the only way that we can lose is if Luan reverts to her old ways. I don't know if any of you noticed, but her pranks are, shall we say, much less lethal this time around."

"I thought I was the only one who noticed that," Lana replied. "Usually she's got our clothes nailed to the wall or all our furniture on the roof or something. None of that this year."

"It's like she's not even trying," Lori said.

"This is gonna sound crazy," Lincoln added, "but she almost seems _proud_ of the way we're pranking her."

"You mean like she's actually having fun on our terms?" Lola asked. "Not just hers?"

"Yeah. Think of how miserable we've been in April Fools past. Barricading ourselves in our rooms, hiding, being scared. Have you felt any of that today?"

There was a long silence between the siblings as they mulled Lincoln's question. As they did, a realization dawned over Lisa first of all, the little genius answering, "I have not. If anything, I have felt rather enthused and, for lack of a better word, goofy."

"So have I," Lynn added. "When Luna and I were tickling her she didn't even try and fight back. Heck, _we_ were laughing, and we weren't even getting tickled!"

Lucy said, "This has been a much more enjoyable April Fools for all of us, it seems. Myself included."

"Honestly," Lincoln said, "I've had a blast today. Heck, if this is the way it's going to be from now on, April Fools Day will be no problem for us!"

"You know what, Linc? I think you may be right," Lynn said with a smile. "Maybe Luan was _waiting_ for us to fight back."

"I never thought I'd say this," Lori said, "but I'm actually looking forward to April Fools next year." When she said this, a collective "WHAT?!" and shocked expressions all around was her siblings' answer. "You heard me. If we can do this again next year-"

A loud splat left a deafening silence as a banana cream pie landed right in the middle of their circle. Lisa turned around and looked up at the house, figuring out the necessary calculations in her head while her siblings rose from the ground with a tense readiness. "It appears as if this pie came from upstairs," Lisa said. "And judging by the trajectory and the speed with which it arrived, it seems to have come from-"

A series of blinding lights illuminated the backyard, bathing the group in white. Lincoln used his hand as a shield and glared up at the window, trying to see what was going on. All of a sudden, Luan's laugh filled the air as another pie flew from the window and hit Lisa in the face, covering her in filling and crust as her siblings screamed in terror. What Luan said next sent chills down everyone's spine and let them know that, yes, the old Luan- _April Fools_ Luan-had returned.

"WAKE UP! TIME TO _PIE!"_


	8. Ready To Pie

"RUN FOR IIIIIIIIIIIIT!"

Banana cream pies rained down like missiles as the Louds tore around the backyard, trying to find some sort of cover. Lola and Lana were the lucky ones, finding a hiding place with their sandbox. It was leaning up against the side of the house, in storage for the winter, and they grabbed it and tipped it over, taking shelter in the upside-down turtle. A trail of pies followed Lynn as she serpentined around the yard. An errant fling hit Lincoln in the head, and when he felt the back of his skull, he came away with a fistful of filling and screamed as if he'd been shot. Luna had actually managed to catch one of the pies and threw it back at Luan, but she barely missed-the pie landed just below the window and slid down. Lori picked up Lisa and ran for the kitchen door, but was stopped by a rain of pies. She tried running through the garage, but upon opening the door, she saw a litany of spring-loaded traps waiting for her. She shut the door and returned to the backyard, where a pie caught her in the back.

Throughout all of this, Luan let out a series of unhinged cackles as she loaded up the slingshot and fired off one shot after another. Behind her, Leni cursed herself for being so helpless. _My family's in trouble! If I want to help them, I've gotta get out of this baby prison! But how?_ She glanced around the inside of the crib and found a pair of latches on either side in front of her. Leni slipped off her sandals and began working on the first latch with her toes, fidgeting with the mechanism in an attempt to unhook it. It was no use, so she turned her attention to the opposite latch, trying her best to free herself. But it was second verse, same as the first when it came to that. She let out a disappointed groan and kicked the side of the crib, the ensuing jolt dropping the guardrail to the ground and freeing her. Leni blinked in surprise and said to herself, "Huh. How about that?"

But there were more important things to worry about. Her eyes narrowed at Luan, so caught up in her attack that she didn't notice Leni had escaped. She hopped over to Lily's changing table and grabbed a fresh diaper from the pack with her teeth. _Now to stop Luan!_

She hopped towards her before realizing she was still tied up. With her arms pinned to her sides, there was no way she'd be able to counter Luan. With all her might, Leni squirmed and struggled and managed to work open a small space in the rope at mid-chest level. She wriggled her arms through the opening and grabbed the diaper from her teeth, stretching her arms out in front of her to see how much reach she had. To her delight, she had enough reach to stretch her arms just over her head.

That would have to do.

* * *

Lola and Lana peeked out from under their hiding place and were shocked at what they saw. The entire backyard was a mess of tins and their siblings were laying on the ground, covered in pie filling and whipped cream, groaning as if they'd been through D-Day. Being mistaken for a war zone would be completely appropriate for any outsider that came across this scene. Luan grinned at the scene before her and yelled, "I got you! ALL of you! There's no way you can beat me now! There's only three hours left, and it's gonna take a miracle toMMPH!"

As her siblings stared up at the window, a white object was thrust over Luan's face and she fell backwards into the bedroom, the slingshot falling out of the window and onto the ground below. Luna wondered out loud, "What the heck was that?"

The realization hit Lincoln like a ton of bricks. _"Leni!"_

Indeed, Leni had hopped up behind Luan and thrown the diaper over her face, and in the ensuing struggle, the duo hopping across the room and knocking things off the shelves, Luan kicked the slingshot out of the window as she broke free of Leni's grip. The blonde tossed the diaper aside and exclaimed, "I blinded you! Get it?"

Luan growled and charged Leni, with her older sister jumping out of the way and landing on a bottle of baby oil, her weight causing the top of the bottle to fly off and hit Luan in the back of the head, knocking her to the floor. Leni hopped over to the stacks of pies and grabbed one, throwing it at Luan with all her might with the dessert nailing her in the chest. Frustrated, Leni grabbed another one and threw it, this time nailing Luan right in the face. When she cleared the filling from her eyes, she saw that her slingshot was no longer sitting in the window. She rushed to the open space and looked out, promptly being met by a spray of water from the garden hose with Lola squeezing the trigger. The pageant queen laughed maniacally and declared, "I think you need to _clean up_ your act!"

Luan backed away from the window and wiped her face off with her shirt. One mess gave way to another, however, as Leni threw another pie in her face. Now it was on. Luan grabbed one and threw it at Leni, who ducked and hopped over to Lisa's workstation. She started rummaging through the drawers as Luan grabbed a whole arsenal of pies and stalked up to her with a wicked grin. "There's nowhere to hop, Leni! Now it's time for dessert! Open wide!"

"You first!" Leni grabbed a fountain pen and squirted the ink into Luan's face, the blackness blinding her as her sister grabbed two pies and slammed them into either side of her head, leaving Luan momentarily stunned as Leni scooted downstairs. The moment she reached the bottom, a series of rapid steps signaled that Luan was on her way down. She turned around and saw the jokester barreling down the steps with ill intent, jumping out of the way as she ran into the front door. Leni pulled her off the door, opened it and hopped outside. Not knowing where else to go, she pressed the garage door opener button in Vanzilla and waited for the door to rise. And it fully opened just in time, as Luan had regained her bearings and crept up behind her. She slapped her hands on Leni's shoulders and turned her around so she was facing her, asking, "What's up, sis?"

"Oh...um, nothing! I was, like, airing out the garage!"

"Nice try, Leni, but it's gonna take a lot more than that to take Luan Loud down!" She stalked closer to her, Leni hopping back until she tripped and fell on her butt, scooting backwards into the garage as Luan moved in. "I know every nook and cranny of this house! I know everywhere you can hide! I know what you're gonna do before you even do it! I am the _queen of April Fools,_ and there is NOTHING that can stop me!"

With her next step, however, Luan stepped on a piece of string that turned on the light in the garage, turned every booby trap that had been set up towards her, and readied them to fire. As she witnessed all this happen, Leni hopped out the back door into the backyard as Luan gaped in fright at the small array of pies, boxing gloves and water traps that were aimed directly at her. The only exclamation she could muster was a small, "Dang it."

Three pies hit her in the face, the stomach, and her legs. Three small hoses blasted her with ice-cold water. A massive fan turned on, creating a small windstorm and chilling Luan even further. And as the final coup de grace, two boxing gloves sprung out and nailed her in the chops, knocking Luan for a loop and causing her to land on the floor with a thud. Her family surrounded the garage as Luan groaned in pain, a rather nasty shiner having formed around her left eye that made her siblings cringe. She rose to her feet after two minutes, shook the cobwebs out of her head, and groaned, "Time. I call time. No more."

"All right," Lincoln said as he got some ice for her eye. "Let's go inside and sort all this out."


	9. A New Game Plan

Lynn Sr. and Rita flew to Luan's side when the Loud siblings walked-or, in Leni's case, hopped-in the door. Lincoln and Luna guided her to the couch as Rita exclaimed, "Oh my goodness, Luan! What happened to you?"

"She accidentally activated the prank she set up in the garage," Lincoln replied. "A couple of boxing gloves got her pretty good."

"I'll say," Lynn Sr. said. "Are you okay, honey?"

"Yeah, dad, I'm fine," Luan replied. She pointed to her black eye and cracked, "When it comes to pranking, you win some, you _bruise_ some! Hahahahaha!"

Her dad cracked a small smile as he sat down next to her. "Do you know if anything happened to your teeth?"

"Uh...they feel fine, and that's the _tooth."_

"Lisa, honey, can you take a look at Luan's teeth for us?"

"Absolutely. Just allow me to gather some dental instruments."

"Sure, sure. Go ahead." The little genius went upstairs to her room as Lincoln grabbed some more ice from the freezer, placing it in a plastic sandwich bag before giving it to Luan, who pressed it to her eye. She smiled and said, "Thanks, Lincoln. That was really _ice_ of you! Hahahahaha! Get it?"

"Yeah, I get it," he replied with a smile. Before he could say anything else, Lisa tapped him on the shoulder and signaled for him to move. Lincoln did so, and she walked onto the couch, instructing Luan to face her and open her mouth. She did, and with a small flashlight and mirror, Lisa took a long, hard look at Luan's brace-filled mouth to see if any teeth were broken or jarred loose by the impact. After a solid two minutes of searching, Lisa reported her findings.

"Upon close, thorough inspection of my elder sister's mouth, I have come to the conclusion that she has suffered no dental damage as a result of her own trap."

The family breathed a collective sigh of relief at the diagnosis. "The periorbital hematoma should vanish in a week or two, and some continued applications of ice should keep the swelling down. Aside from that, Luan is perfectly fine."

Lucy appeared next to Lisa without warning, startling her. "So she won't be permanently injured from this?"

After she caught her breath, Lisa replied, "Nope."

"Sigh."

"That's good to know," the jokester said with a relieved sigh. "That means I can still pull off some more April Fools fun!"

"Actually," Lori said as she pointed to the clock, "it's just past midnight. It's April 2nd now." She grinned and concluded, "So I guess it's time to figure out who won!"

"Aw, nuts."

Leni thought about what Lori had just said and replied, "Oh yeah! Who _did_ win?"

Lisa said, "We will find that out in a few seconds, Leni. All I need to do is enter the necessary variables.." She did so, and after thirty seconds of work, the GPS beeped, the results of a day's worth of pranks from both sides finally revealed.

The little genius announced, "The final tallies for April Fools Day are as follows: Luan's final total comes out to..." She paused for dramatic effect. "22 successful pranks." A satisfied smile appeared on Luan's face.

"Between all of us, our final total comes out to..." A tense silence hung in the air. Luan's pranking fate hung in the balance as the number appeared on Lisa's machine. When it did, she gasped in amazement and shock at the total.

"Our final total comes out to 22 successful pranks."

An awkward silence hung in the air for what seemed like an eternity as Lisa's declaration sunk in. Once it did, Luan gasped in surprise while everyone else let out a simultaneous _"WHAT?!"_

Lori exclaimed, "We TIED?!"

"I don't believe this!" Lana yelled.

"What now?" Luna asked. "Is Luan gonna prank us April Fools-style all week? Are we the kings and queens of April Fools now? WHAT'S GOING ON?!"

"I...I don't know," Lincoln answered. "None of us prepared for this, and here we are! Our nightmare scenario! What are we gonna do?"

The sound of applause answered his question as they turned to see Luan clapping her hands. However, unlike yesterday, there was a huge, friendly smile on her face and joy in her applause as she rose to her feet, giving her family a standing ovation. Her parents and siblings, however, were confused as all get out by her reaction.

"Hey, Luan, you didn't win and neither did we," Luna said. "What's the deal?"

Luan smiled and replied, "I'm proud of you guys-that's what the deal is!"

Her family talked amongst themselves after hearing what she'd said, with Lincoln asking, "What are you so proud about? That you narrowly dodged a bullet?"

"Nah, not that, Linc! I'm proud that you guys kept up with me! This was the most fun I've had on April Fools probably _ever,_ and it was all thanks to you! And...maybe just a tiny, tiny bit that I can still prank you guys."

"Really? You're not mad?"

"Why would I be mad? Your pranks were all great! You guys came at me with the same zest and enthusiasm that I have, and you had some pretty darn good jokes to go along with 'em!"

A knowing grin came across Lynn's face as she said, "Yeah, I guess we did. We just got our ideas from watching you all these years."

"Hey, you learned from the best! Comedy's meant to be shared, and I'm so glad you guys put this plan together. But I have to say...things got a little out of hand towards the end there on my part."

"And you have the bruise to show for it," Lucy said.

Luan gave a knowing nod before continuing. "I just got so caught up in the scoring that I was willing to do anything to win, and that's not what this should be about. Heck, if anything, you guys have made me wanna change up my game plan for next year!"

An excited _"REALLY?!"_ exploded from her parents and siblings. However, they quickly composed themselves as Lincoln asked, "Well, what did you have in mind?"

"How about this? Instead of me versus all of you, let's make it a _friendly_ competition. You guys can prank me and you can even prank each other if you want, but at the end of the day, whoever pranked the most _won't_ be the winner." With his permission, Luan grabbed Lincoln's GPS and asked Lisa, "Can these things record video?"

"Not at the moment, but I can install a video camera in each of them."

"Cool! So basically, you guys film your pranks, and at the end of the day, give them to me and I'll decide who wins the grand prize! I'll judge them based on creativity, difficulty, and most of all, hilarity."

Echoing Luan's question from two days ago, Lincoln asked, "And what are the stakes?"

"Whoever wins will get a year-long reprieve from my pranks." Excited murmuring was heard amongst her siblings before Luna stepped forward, tapping her finger against her chin in an exaggerated thinking motion. "Hmmm...those are some high stakes. I'm not sure if we can accept..."

"Yeah," Leni replied in agreement. "Like, how do we know you're not just gonna give that award to yourself every year?"

"Because that wouldn't be fair. It's high time you guys got a reward for putting up with this." Luan's eyes began to well up as she continued. "For the first time in a long time, you guys were laughing on April Fools Day. You have no idea how much that means to me. For a comedian, there's nothing sadder than performing to an audience that isn't there...and that's what I've been doing all these years. I didn't realize how bad I was hurting you until I got this"-she pointed to her black eye-"in the garage earlier. I thought, if this is what I'm doing, if this is what I'm putting you guys through every year..." A few stray tears escaped Luan's eyes as she finished. "All I want is to make you guys laugh. I never wanted to make you cry."

Moved by her statement, Luna walked over and gave Luan a big hug. "It's okay, sis. It's okay." She motioned for her siblings and parents to join her, and they were all more than happy to oblige. Soon, the Loud family was engulfed in a giant group hug as Luan smiled gratefully at their action. After the hug broke, Luna said, "That friendly competition is a great idea, Luan. We accept your terms."

Luan extended her hand to her sister with a smile to seal the deal. As Luna returned the gesture, Lincoln turned to the camera and said, "April Fools Day has always been a day we've dreaded here in the Loud house. But now, thanks to our not-so-successful plan, April Fools may just become one of our favorite days of the year. Of course, only time will tell, but for now, we're gonna enjoy this moment." He turned to face his sisters, and when Luna pulled her hand back, she pulled Luan's arm back along with her. She paled in fright and screamed along with her family before Luan popped her real arm out of her shirt, exclaiming, "That was a pretty dis- _arm_ -ing gesture! Hahahahaha! Get it?" Her family let out a hearty laugh as Luan added, "And _that_ is why I'm the queen of April Fools!"

"You sure are, Luan," Lori replied. "You sure are." With a grin, her family stepped backwards as the eldest Loud sibling turned on the sprinkler, which had been taped to the ceiling. The gentle spray soaked Luan to the bone as Lori delivered the punchline:

"And long may you _rain!"_

Luan laughed at Lori's joke while her sisters, brother and parents laughed right along with her, before turning to the camera and collectively exclaiming, "Get it?"

April Fools Day was over, but a new era had just begun in the Loud house.


	10. Epilogue: Soda Truth Comes Out

ONE MONTH LATER

Lana Loud crawled into the kitchen through Charles' doggy door, caked in mud. A brief rainstorm had since dissipated, leaving huge puddles in the backyard that proved too tempting for her to resist. Once she was inside, she did another imitation of her pet dog and shook off the mud and grime that covered her, sending it flying all over the walls. She left the mess behind and sauntered to the fridge, looking to rehydrate after her outdoors romp. And as luck would have it, there was a cold 12-pack of Sprite there for the taking.

"Score!" Lana grabbed a can, cracked it open and prepared to chug its contents when a dawning realization stopped her cold. Without warning, the memories of the family's April Fools Day contest against Luan filled her head as she put the can on the kitchen table and began to retrace her steps: _We were tied at four pranks apiece. Luan was setting up the cake launcher in the fridge. I'd just shaken up that can and gotten out of Dodge before she could see me; I made sure to put it right in her line of sight. She opened it and got sprayed. I ran through and delivered my punchline, but..._

And that was when it hit her. Lana paled in shock and pounded her fist into the table, knocking the can over. It spilled out its contents for a fraction of a second before she righted it, and in the blink of an eye, she left the kitchen and tore upstairs, calling for Luan. She approached the door to the room she shared with Luna and pounded on it with reckless abandon until the door swung open. Instead of her jokester sister, however, Lana found herself face to face with Mr. Coconuts. The dummy asked, "What's all the racket about, toots? I'm practicin' for my next performance!"

"Sorry, Mr. Coconuts! I really, _really_ need to talk to Luan!"

"Okay. What's the password?"

Lana rolled her eyes and groaned, "Come on, Luan! I need to talk to you really bad!"

"And you can talk to her when you give me the password!" All Lana could do was slap her forehead in frustration and repeat verbatim the phrase Luan had taught her: "Luan Loud is the greatest comedian the world has, or will, ever know."

Mr. Coconuts vanished from her sight as the brace-filled smile of her older sister took the dummy's place. "Why, thank you, Lana! Come on in!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." The handywoman entered the bedroom and closed the door as Luan retreated to her small refrigerator, asking, "You want something to drink?"

"Actually...that's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"You wanna talk about soda?" Luan asked as she put her can down on the dresser.

"Well, soda's a small part of it. Let's just say that I have something on my mind."

The jokester arched her eyebrow in curiosity and replied, "And what would that be?"

"You remember this past April Fools Day? The us versus you competition?"

Luan grinned from ear to ear and exclaimed, "Of course! That was one of the greatest days of my life! I can't wait to see what you guys are gonna do next year!"

 _Oh, that's just great._ Lana turned her stare to the floor as she mumbled, "Well, you know how we wound up tied at the end of it all?"

"Yeah..." Luan's face showed slight concern as she asked, "Was there something wrong with the totals?"

Lana let out a heavy sigh and replied, "Actually...there was. After you set up the catapult in the fridge, you opened a can of soda that I shook up. Remember?"

"I remember, and it was a- _lime_ -ingly refreshing! Hahahahaha!"

Lana couldn't help but grin herself at the memory as she continued her confession. "I delivered the punchline and ran out, but...I just got so caught up in the fun I was having that..." She trailed off, shook her head, and took a deep breath, finally getting the words out:

"...I forgot to count it towards our total pranks."

The realization took a few seconds to sink in as Luan pondered what Lana had told her. But when it hit, Luan let out a huge, shocked gasp and covered her mouth with her hands, exclaiming, "So that means that..."

"Yeah," Lana sadly replied. "Technically, we won."

The confession knocked Luan for a loop as she realized the magnitude of Lana's error. She grabbed her by the suspenders and asked, "Does anyone else know?"

"No. Just you. I don't plan on telling anyone else either."

"Why not? This changes everything." Luan pulled out a notebook and began to take stock of all her pranking accessories. With more than a hint of sadness in her voice, she said, "You guys beat me fair and square. Looks like I'll have to hang up my pranking hat."

Lana gasped in horror and retorted with, "Luan, no! You don't have to do this! Please stop!"

"I have to, sis." Luan grabbed an empty cardboard box and began throwing all her props into it. "Goodbye, fake dog poop. See you later, whoopie cushion. Au revoir, fake vomit."

"Luan, PLEASE!"

"Lana, you guys won. That means it's time for me to stop pranking...to stop being funny."

"I SAID _**NO!"**_ The force of Lana's statement stopped Luan dead in her tracks as she looked up from the box. "Get that idea out of your head right now!"

"But those were the stakes! You can't just go back on your word!"

"Well, as of this moment, I am!" Lana reached out and grabbed the box from Luan, dumping its contents onto the floor. "I can't let you do this to yourself!"

Her sister's righteous fury left Luan at an uncharacteristic loss for words. Lana was breathing heavily, her face scrunched up in an attempt to appear serious, but instead looking like she had a bathroom emergency. "Lana..." Luan's face had sympathy written all over it as she knelt before Lana so they were eye to eye. "There's a bigger reason you didn't count that prank, isn't there?"

When she asked that question, a flood of memories hit Lana all at once-Luan and Mr. Coconuts telling jokes at her sixth birthday party. Luan cranking out armpit farts alongside Lana, laughing all the while. Learning how to juggle bouncy balls with Luan giving helpful pointers. It was too much for Lana to handle, and she burst into tears on the spot. Luan's sisterly instincts kicked in as she reached into her shirt pocket and held out a small handkerchief, which wound up in Lana's hands in the blink of an eye. She blew her nose with a loud honk and tossed the soaked rag into the dirty laundry, breathing heavily for a while as Luan sat next to her and rubbed her back to calm her down. The comforting gesture caused her cries to lessen to sniffles as Luan asked, "You okay?"

"Y...yeah..."

"Did you not count that prank on purpose?" Lana gulped back the lump in her throat and nodded her head.

"Why did you do that?"

Her younger sister remained silent as she tried to find the words to explain. Luan assured her with a sympathetic, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I understand."

"No. I have to tell you." Lana sniffled and began her explanation. "If we won, you would've had to stop doing what you love. I mean, sure, your pranks can get out of hand sometimes, but that's who you are. I...I couldn't take that away from you." Lana dragged her arm across her eyes and continued: "It's like what happened with Lincoln and the victory undies. I didn't count my prank because...it wouldn't be fair to have us happy and you miserable. You're always looking on the bright side of things, you always have a joke to tell, and you'll do anything for a laugh. Without that, this house wouldn't be the same. I love you too much to ever do something like that to you."

Luan pulled Lana closer and rested her head on top of her sister's hat, sniffling back tears of her own as she replied, "That's the most beautiful thing anyone's ever said to me."

"And I mean all of it. But...is there anything I can do to make this up to you?"

Luan grabbed the can of soda and said, "Actually..." Lana asked, "What's wrong? Are you not thirsty anymore?"

Luan's reply was ten hard shakes of the can before she handed it to her younger sister. As Lana held it in her hand, she instantly realized what Luan was doing. A grateful smile appeared on her face as her elder sister said, "I am...but I think you need it more."

It was all Lana could do to keep from crying again as she cracked open the can, sending the carbonated beverage into her face. Her eyes glistened, both from the soda and the kindness of her sister's gesture, and Lana stretched out her arms and ran into Luan's, who had done the same. Within seconds, the both of them were enveloped in a massive hug, with Lana exclaiming "Thank you" over and over again while Luan smiled and rubbed the back of her head.

"There's no need to thank me, Lana. I'm just doing what's _Sprite."_ Lana began to laugh as Luan removed her hat and ruffled her hair, saying, "Now we're even."

"Cool beans," Lana said as she put her hat back on. With a new, determined grin, she declared, "But you just wait until next year! I'm gonna get you so good!"

"Not if I get you first!" Luan squeezed the trigger of her fake flower and sent a small jet of water flying at Lana, who ducked and reached into her pants pocket, grabbing a handful of earthworms. "Let's see you _worm_ your way out of this one!"

The door exploded open as Luan and Lana ran downstairs, both of them laughing as they exchanged good-natured pranks. Life in the Loud house was officially back to normal.

* * *

The Loud House and its characters belong to Nickelodeon and Chris Savino.


End file.
